The End of an Era

The date - December 23, 1920. The place - A small humble home in the farming community of Bowdin, Maine. The event - The birth of Milton R. Lane. Who the that this little baby would accomplish so much in his life, and that he would leave touch the lives of so many people.

I've been thinking about him a lot lately, and my mother too. The reason is because their birthdays just past and it's the first year that I haven't made a birthday call to them in 25 years. My mother passed away in 2007 and my father just passed away last October. They both had a very big influence in my life, but especially my father. So I'll dedicate this blog to him.



I learned a lot from him. I learned how to drive, to do home repairs, carpentry, car repairs, geneaology, and many other things. For the last year and a half of his life he underwent his most severe challenge. He had a stroke back in February 2007 which left him paralyzed on his left side. Unable to do even the most basic of tasks he had to rely on everyone else to help him out. This man who for years was the one everyone called when they needed help, now needed help himself, and he didn't want to ask for the help. But the help came anyway. The family came together to do what we could. The lot fell upon our youngest sister Judy to become the main caretaker for my father since she had the training and the time to help him. We were able to keep him at home for most of the rest of his life.


It was difficult to talk to him because it was hard for him to focus and to talk. I'm sure there was a lot he would like to have said, but for the last year he mainly just wanted to finish his mission here on this earth and go back to be with his wife who passed on before him, our brother Randy who died back in 1987, and all of his brothers, sisters and parents who have all passed away to continue their mission in the next life. But I remember that he was active until shortly before his stroke.


In 2004 he came back to my home in Fairport, NY, and with the help of my brother-in-law Charlie, my father was out there with us cutting down some very tall trees. Keep in mind that my father at this point was almost 84 years old. I admired him for his ability to keep going for so long when I have seen younger men than him give up and spend their time sitting down in front of the TV all day. I learned a lot from him. Thanks Mom and Dad, for everything.

Boxing Day?

New Year Day, or the first Saturday after New Years, has become "Boxing Day" in our house. While it isn't the same as Boxing Day in the UK, it is a tradition nonetheless. In our home it means that it's time to take down all of the Christmas Decorations and "box them up". We did that today. While I love the Christmas holiday with all of its trimmings, decorations, gift giving, parties, food, and the general feeling of goodwill and peace on earth, I dread this day.

I'll give you an example of why. When my wife and I were first married we were able to move everything we owned, up two flights of stairs into our first apartment in just 15 minutes. There were three of us doing that. Today it took us (mostly me when it came to the packing and clean up) nearly 5 hours just to take down the decorations, pack them up and take them down one flight of stairs and put them into the basement. Next year I would like to put them up the day after Thanksgiving so that there's more time to enjoy them while they're up. We didn't get them up until after the first week of December and then we didn't trim the tree until after our daughter got home the Sunday before Christmas.

I love the holidays. Check out the slideshow to see what our house looked like on the inside with the decorations up.

FESTIVUS! For the Rest of Us!

For those of you who don't know what Festivus is I need to refer you back to an episode of the TV sitcom, "Seinfeld". While it was originally created by writer Dan O'Keefe and his family in 1966, it was first introduced into popular culture by his son Daniel, a scriptwriter for the TV show Seinfeld. The holiday includes novel practices such as the "Airing of Grievances, while holding an aluminum pole (undecorated), and having each person tell everyone else all the ways they have disappointed him or her over the past year. We changed it a little so that the grievances don't have anything to do with the people there, but more of the general grievances they have about other things that happened throughout the year, or just in general. Also, after the Festivus meal, the "Feats of Strength" are performed, involving wrestling the head of the household to the floor, with the holiday ending only if the head of the household is actually pinned. These conventions originated with the TV episode. We decided to celebrate Festivus as a gathering of friends , usually on New Years Eve, or a night close to it that coincides with our schedule.

We had our Festivus party last night with a group of friends from church. We probably had 20 + people in attendance. Everyone was supposed to bring leftover food or food that you got as gifts (like fruitcake and chocolate, cake and cookies, etc.) No one was supposed to go to any great trouble to make something. We ate off paper plates to aid in the cleanup. It was a lot of fun. We had our airing of the grievances, and then for the feats of strength we went downstairs and played on their Wii machine. I had never played one of those before and I left sweating up a storm. We left sometime after midnight and realized that this was probably the first time we had gotten home "after" our 22 year old daughter had. It was worth it. We've been to so many parties this year that we are just partied out. I enjoy the holidays, but I sure am glad they're over. Happy Festivus, Happy New Year and all that.

Christmas Letters

Growing up, my father used to write the annual christmas letter to everyone. The unique thing about how he wrote these letters was that he wrote it in the form of a poem. Now my father may not have been the best poet in the world (he wasn't what you would write books about), but he made the letters interesting. The end of every sentence rhymed, and he made sure to include everyone in the letter. Our family consisted of my mom and dad, my two brothers, myself, and my three sisters. I'm number 5 of 6. I don't think he really started these letters until the early 1960's, and they became something to look forward too. The first thing everybody looked for was what he had to say about them. I was no different. I loved reading about me. I'd zoom in on those passages right away. It seemed like this way we knew he was taking the time to think about us and the highlights of our life that year.

As time went on the letters became better looking. I remember the first time we put a family photo in the letter. Then he started adding graphics. After a while he even started adding color. Each year was a new adventure in what my father would come up with next. We all signed our names to the letter and then sent it out. I think I have almost every christmas letter he wrote since I was born. It's a great history lesson.

As time went on, the family grew. We all got married, had kids, and started traditions of our own. But the Christmas Letter kept coming. He still tried to include all of us but the paragraphs got shorter. We knew he was still thinking about us though and we always enjoyed these letters. Some of us even continued the tradition, though without the poetry.

I don't necessarily have a gift for writing so my wife writes the Christmas Letter. While some people don't necessarily enjoy an "annual history lesson", my wife writes them in such a way that people kind of look forward to them. They are funny, informative, and not loaded with all of the traditional "everything great, nothing's wrong" type of stories. I appreciate the time she puts into doing this because in my mind, it keeps the tradition alive. This year we ran out of time and energy. So much was going on. She wrote a much shorter letter this year and I want to share it with you. So for anyone that's reading this, enjoy.

Merry Christmas - Happy New Year 2009

I know you were looking forward to a jam-packed, wordy Christmas letter from the Lane family, but it's just not going to happen this year. I'm just going to try to touch on some of the high points.
Kevin began a new career this year working as a financial advisor with AXA Advisors. It has been challenging learning a new career, but he really likes it. He is in the Young Men's Presidency at Church now, which is great for a former (and actually present) Scouter. Sadly, his dad passed away in October, but he was really not doing well and was just waiting to be with Kevin's mom, his mother and father, brothers and sisters, and son. The family gathered together in San Jose, CA for one last farewell to him.
Karen finally found a job she can live with! She is working as a receptionist for another CPA firm, one that is closer to home, and it has been great. She's not nearly the nervous wreck she used to be, though at times she still feels overwhelmed with trying to work full-time and keeping up with everything else. However, she no longer drives to work with knots in her stomach (except for the day after the election). At church, Karen leads the music in Sacrament Meeting. What a great calling - no meetings, no planning - just show up and wave your arm!
Everything else includes the chorus that Karen and Kevin still belong to (Genesee Valley Orchestra and Chorus (GVOC - www.gvoc.org). This year Karen decided to challenge herself by singing in the tenor section for "The Messiah" Concert. A challenge it was, but still fun. But she'll be going back to the alto section for the next concert. Kevin was in charge of the major fundraiser for the chorus, as well as working on the publicity committee. He just gets into that stuff.
Darling Tara is now 22, graduates from BYU in April, and will soon be out on her own in the big city of her choice! She spent 10 weeks in Washington, DC this summer doing an internship for school and loved every minute of her big adventure. She started a blog and has a few loyal readers (besides Mom and Dad). You can visit it at http://tarablogs.blogspot.com. At the end of her internship we picked her up, spent a couple of days in DC and the rest of the week at the beaches in Delaware. We had such a great time. I always talk about traveling, but honestly, I don't know why - we have everything we need right here in the good ol' USA!